And there ya' are
Posted: January 12th, 2010, 8:14 pm
You're out in the woods with your .30-30 in hand. You have the landowner's permission to be there, in fact he just left a little while ago. You're on the north end of the property in some planted slash pines, on the north side of a creek bottom that runs SE-NW. It's mid-afternoon, cool, windy and sunny. The mercury will be dropping tonight. You're looking at a two-man ladder stand that the owner, different person from the land owner, left there on the ground; and you have his permission to set the stand up wherever you want and use it. You reach out and rock the stand to see if you can drag it by yourself 40 yds. up the hill to a certain longleaf pine you have picked out. You decide you can so you set your rifle down to use both hands on the stand and drag it up to the pine. You make two more trips for the ladder pieces, the ladder brace and the straps; then one more trip to retrieve your rifle. Once everything is up the hill you set your rifle off to the side; out of range of the stand in case you drop it. You tip the stand up against the tree, heft it up to see if you can get it high enough to get the first section of ladder under it and realize that it would have been helpful if you had placed that first section where you could reach it. So you put the stand back down and go get a section of ladder, leaning it against a nearby sparkleberry. You hoist the stand back up, reach with your left for the ladder; and now it's just inches out of reach instead of feet. So you put the stand back down, move the ladder, pick the stand back up, grab the ladder, hold the stand in place while you get the ladder positioned. Whew!! There's one section.
<"How high do we want to go?">
<"Well let's see how high we can go. This will get tougher with each section.">
You position the second ladder section where you can for sure reach it this time. Grunt the stand up. Hold it with one hand while lining up the uprights of the second ladder to the first. This is when you realize that a third section ain't happening. The other two sections will be staying on the ground.
<"One thing about doing this by yourself - we're not even a little bit cold.">
You jockey the stand around the tree to be facing a little more north than where it was when you got it up. You'd like to take it a little further, but there's a little oak in the way thats too big to pull up with your hands.
<"Oh well, that'll do. And I think it's plenty high for this ground.">
Now to climb up in it and secure the tree straps. Through this whole operation you haven't been trying to be even a little quiet.
<"Okay, that's done let's sit minute and see how things look from up here.>"
<"Yep, looks good. We're high enough and ... Oh, crap a deer.">
It's a nice six-point. Not at all big, but he will fill the freezer nicely ... except for the minor problem of your rifle still being on the ground.
You reach out and try to do the Luke Skywalker/Jedi trick of telekinesis. Not gonna' happen. So you light a cigar and sit to watch. When you blow your nose he snaps his head up: "OHCRAPAHUMAN!!", and shoots off into the creek bottom.
So you climb down, get your rifle, climb back up; and don't even see a squirrel the rest of the time you're there.
<"How high do we want to go?">
<"Well let's see how high we can go. This will get tougher with each section.">
You position the second ladder section where you can for sure reach it this time. Grunt the stand up. Hold it with one hand while lining up the uprights of the second ladder to the first. This is when you realize that a third section ain't happening. The other two sections will be staying on the ground.
<"One thing about doing this by yourself - we're not even a little bit cold.">
You jockey the stand around the tree to be facing a little more north than where it was when you got it up. You'd like to take it a little further, but there's a little oak in the way thats too big to pull up with your hands.
<"Oh well, that'll do. And I think it's plenty high for this ground.">
Now to climb up in it and secure the tree straps. Through this whole operation you haven't been trying to be even a little quiet.
<"Okay, that's done let's sit minute and see how things look from up here.>"
<"Yep, looks good. We're high enough and ... Oh, crap a deer.">
It's a nice six-point. Not at all big, but he will fill the freezer nicely ... except for the minor problem of your rifle still being on the ground.
You reach out and try to do the Luke Skywalker/Jedi trick of telekinesis. Not gonna' happen. So you light a cigar and sit to watch. When you blow your nose he snaps his head up: "OHCRAPAHUMAN!!", and shoots off into the creek bottom.
So you climb down, get your rifle, climb back up; and don't even see a squirrel the rest of the time you're there.
