Happy Valentines Day Honey

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lizbeth
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Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by lizbeth »

A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan . . .


All he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know... they have frozen glasses... "


He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.


The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"


"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps and little quiches.


"But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? OK, THEN, LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER. GOT IT, JACKASS?"

... and they lived happily ever after.



Isn't that a sweet story? MADE MY EYES TEAR UP . .
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whitebc
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by whitebc »

:lol:
A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the telephone.
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Reel Cowboy
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by Reel Cowboy »

That's how it be.
In the words of the great Doc Holliday, "I'll be your huckleberry"
slowroller
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by slowroller »

WOW, I really shouldn't read stuff like that a month before my wedding. :smt010
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Reel Cowboy
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by Reel Cowboy »

slowroller wrote:WOW, I really shouldn't read stuff like that a month before my wedding. :smt010

Why? What have you done to deserve being happy?
In the words of the great Doc Holliday, "I'll be your huckleberry"
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Flanders
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by Flanders »

slowroller wrote:WOW, I really shouldn't read stuff like that a month before my wedding. :smt010
:smt005 :smt005 :smt005
I come from a small drinking community with a fishing problem
slowroller
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by slowroller »

Nothing I guess, I'll stay home and drink from my frosty mug and eat pig in the blanket.
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Flanders
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by Flanders »

slowroller wrote:Nothing I guess, I'll stay home and drink from my frosty mug and eat pig in the blanket.
Good Boy!!
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I come from a small drinking community with a fishing problem
snatch-n-reel
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by snatch-n-reel »

That's the real world
Let me get them Numbers!!!!!!!!
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Bow'd Up
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by Bow'd Up »

Sounds like what my wife said some time ago :smt010 :beer: :smt010
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RiverRunner
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by RiverRunner »

I just had to log on to read this thread.....I'm Slowrollers best man! HAHAHAHA.....ya'll ain't living right! That's all I gotta say about that. :)
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RodBow
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by RodBow »

Nothing I guess, I'll stay home and drink from my frosty mug and eat pig in the blanket.
Not bad... until SHE's the pig in the blanket! :o
use your opportunities ...

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carramar
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Re: Happy Valentines Day Honey

Post by carramar »

The correct response is "Yes Dearest". :roll:
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