I have this Friend

[Charles]

I have this friend......
(I'm not going to name him this time. Last time I did that there was another forum member with the same name. Sorry 'bout that, Al. )

So anyway, I have this friend....He tells me that when operating a log splitter....One that can easily and repeatly go through 3+' diameter green liveoak logs....DO NOT get your hands anywhere near the ends of the log. Because if you do......(actually, he knew this, was running the splitter yesterday and this morning, but slipped up one time this afternoon and it bit him)......you know those rubber, fake mangled thumbs that you see at novelty stores and around Halloween?....That's about what my friend's left thumb looks like right now. After being sewn back together. Most of it anyway, there's still a small piece that's probably still in his leather glove. He didn't cut it off. Didn't break any bones, but he did a daa-aamn good job of mashing it. ("Ewww, pretty gross, dude.....let's see it again.")

And of course the log splitter reacted to this little bit of excitement completely aloof, and with complete disregard.

My friend tells me that, as usual with these kinds of things, the worst part of the whole thing is the lidocaine shots. He says as many times as they stuck him, they could have sewn him up without it.

This friend feels bad because it's a little sore, and he throws a baitcaser left handed. But not so bad, since speckled trout closes for a month starting tomorrow.

[Jumptrout51]

BUMMER. Trout season closes tommorrow?

[wevans]

I can sympathize with said friend I tried ta catch a falling power pole "to keep the meter box from getting busted" and it came down on my three middle fingers on the left hand "made em about 1/2 to 3/4 inch longer" the finger nail will never grow out right and he may have no feeling in the tip any more but it sure beats losing em

[Eerman]

You don't have to cover for Al.

[tin can]

Charles, sounds like your friend needs to sit on the porch for a while.

[mjsigns]

I can relate to those lidociane shots. They are actually mixed 50:50 with adrenalin. The adrenalin makes the blood vessels constrict so you don't bleed as much while they laugh and sew you back up. Feels like you are being poked with a white-hot iron with each shot.

[AJ]

Hey Charles, how is this going to effect "Al's" golf game?

[Charles]

Well, my friend was busy over the holidays (ain't we all?, there should be a couple of post-holiday holidays to recover from the holidays) and hasn't picked up a club since before then. He was planning on getting back to it, but this will delay that a little longer.

What this will do that he really doesn't like, is knock him off the bike until the soreness goes away. This is especially bad this close to the full moon. On bright nights when there's no cars around, he likes to turn his headlights off and ride in the moonlight on his way to work.

Ever tried puttin' your socks on without usin' a thumb, or buttoning your shirt using the wrong hand?

[Charles]

Oh, yeah. My friend also tells me that if you use your handkerchief for an ice-pack when something like this happens, the dr.'s office will throw it in the biohazard bin.