Bunny hopin in a kayak

[BAD BEHAVIOR]

I read Suber's post about the fish in the kayak and decided I d share a BB adventure with you guys. All this talk about the world of Yak fishing got me interested in buying a new toy. So I was in Orlando anyway back this fall and decided to go into the Kayak section at the big Outdoor World to look around. Im looking at these Yaks and knowing little to nothing about them, I figured the 14' model that you sit down IN was the one for me. So, here I go, I dip off into the seat, slide my legs around those bars, and sit flat of my tail on the floor of the Yak which I had taken down off the rack to get into. Im having wild dreams of rafting down the Ecky, boiling reds @ daybreak in the creeks Ive always admired from afar, when I hear this giggle. I look around and the cutest little blue eyed , curly haired girl is watching me. I quickly realize that I probably amight foolish and decide its time to abort this mission. As I go to get out I realize I have no leverage as this hole around me has shrunk or the little black membrane deal has swollen. DAYUM!! Thank God for these little guns you guys are always giving me the hard time about. I palm the floor as hard as I can and I am able to pick me and the kayak up about three inches and "Bunny Hop" about three inches forward. Shiot!!! Right as my fat arse flops the ground with the clap of thunder from 14' of plastic, Hot chick walks up looking at the clothes rack beside me trying not to make eye contact with the sweating mongoloid in the kayak. All of a sudden the cute little girl who by this time Ive totally forgotten about says, " Mommy, why is that man stuck in that boat" as bold as if she had a 200 watt Rockford subwoofer in her little body! Of course I look up and mommy is Ms Hotty at the clothes rack and she hurriedly grabs her little girl and politely says its not nice to point. Of course in her mind she's thinking FREAK!@!@@! So, head looking like a strawberry from the shame and lack of blood return from my lower extremities, I proceed to try and work my way out of this predicament. Ouch, wow, that dry rubber seal deal just pulled all three hairs from my arse crack! Really contemplating hitting the airhorn in my basket from aisle nine but didnt want to go to the Disney World Time out room for overweight kayak dryhumpers. So I thought, coast is clear, Ill see if I can bunny hop this biotch to that metal rack and pull myself out. First three bunny hops successful and then that SON OF A BIOTCH landed on my thumb with 250 lbs of fat SON OF A BIOTCH in it!!! Wow, you talk about a smashed digit???? Trying not to sweat my new shovel thumb, I proceed the loud arse flopping, bunny hopping to the edge of the rack. O fcourse when I get there the dang, rotten , stinkin, ragged ,nastyarse rack isnt bolted to the floor so I nearly tump all the other Yaks, onto the floor trying to get out. Not one second after I fished my flip flop out of the nose of that putrid vessel,this little bubbly chick with a Bass Pro Shops T-shirt comes up and says """"IS THERE ANY THING I CAN HELP YOU WITH?????"""" I understand some hate crimes now. I really wasnt loving the little short bubbly chick at that moment in time. From this escapade, Ive ;learned three things .....(1) Bass Pro Shops floors are really dirty. (2) A shovel thumb can be a positive thing. And last but not least.......(3) YA"LL CAN HAVE THEM DAYUM KAYAKS!!!!!!!

[CATCH 22]

Dayum funny there BB, at 265 I can relate

[birddog]

[BAD BEHAVIOR]

Dayum funny there BB, at 265 I can relate

You got a shovel thumb too???

[Barhopr]

funny for sure BB. One thing is for sure though. If you would have been at SGO, the customer service would have been alot worse. I'm sure Heath would have been snapping pictures the whole time to post here. You wont get that kind of service at SGO

[bman]

Best laugh I've had all day!
I can see every moment of it!

[Reel Slow]

Great story BB...Thanks for sharing

[Eerman]

Ahhh...to have access to the security tapes. Great read BB.

[MudDucker]

I'm going to see if there is ANYWAY I can get a copy of the security tape from that incident. I'll bet they are laughing coast to coast in employee meetings over that tape I wouldn't surprised if you became a YouTube hit...kinda like the starwars kid

[jsuber]

You were in a sit-inside and we all fish in a sit on top. Its like the difference between sitting in a bucket and a hammock. I like a hammock myself. Instead of doing something like that, call me and I will let you use one of my yaks, take you out to the water, and teach you how to enjoy your experience. But I love the story.

[BAD BEHAVIOR]

You were in a sit-inside and we all fish in a sit on top. Its like the difference between sitting in a bucket and a hammock. I like a hammock myself. Instead of doing something like that, call me and I will let you use one of my yaks, take you out to the water, and teach you how to enjoy your experience. But I love the story.

Helk , I saw them, I thought something was wrong with them!!

[Just Fish]

At least the little bubbly bass pro chic didn't ask you if you were stuck. You could have said no, I am just practicing for the kayak bunny hop olympics....HERE'S YOUR SIGN!!!!!

[Good Times]

ok, that was funny. I am crying with laughter!!

[bman]

Suber-
Bring one to the social and we will all stand around while you teach BB!

[jsuber]

Sorry, I'll be at teh Bassmasters Classic in Greenville, SC. Ya'll have fun.